facebook is dumb. i mean, it's great to reconnect with old friends and rekindle old flames at the expense of current ones, etc., etc. but it really is dumb. the idea behind it is good. solid. find out what old friends are up to. see pictures of their new babies. i would just like to remind you that, in theory, labor unions and communism were also appealing. the former became the handmaiden of the mortgage lenders. and the two escorted the american economy into a groundbreaking financial crisis. and the latter? well, we'll see how that turns out once the new health care reforms are fully integrated. my point, as i am finally coming to it, is that not all good ideas are good once they come to fruition. facebook is one of these things. as any good historian will do, and i am using the terms "good" and "historian" very loosely here, i am supporting my hypothesis with sound, reliable facts.

• msn cited facebook as the primary factor in one of five divorces in the united states in 2009.
• no one cares if you are tired, sad, overwhelmed, sick, lonely, fighting a cough or a urinary tract infection, missing your husband or your boyfriend, drunk, irritated, annoyed by your children, in need of a girls' night out, excited about some future event; about what you just ate or are about to eat, the size of your thighs, how much you love your kids or your spouse, how much laundry you have, how little money you have, how hard school is, how often your spouse is gone, what book you're reading or movie you're watching, what the weather is like, where you lost your keys, what color your hair is today, how excited you are about the biggest loser, if your kids were funny or cute or exasperating today, or what your current mental status is. why on earth anyone would post about what they're doing throughout the day, is beyond me.
• comments about how great your husband or wife is or how much you love them are best left to texting. mw knows that i love him, and so does anyone who knows us, so i don't need to tell him on facebook. a phone call is a much better means of communicating this. when i read "i love you, babe!" or "i have the greatest hubby!" my first reaction is, do you? do you really? why does everyone else need to know? are you trying to convince someone? or yourself?
• young women have enough problems, i.e. young girls tend to be mean and ugly and selfish and untrustworthy by nature, without worrying about what someone is or isn't posting about them on facebook. for the whole world to read. and for their parents to see.
• if you are trying to find your bff from high school, and have no idea where to look or who to ask, if you have no connection to that person or the world that you previously inhabited, what makes you think that person wants to be friends with you anyway? after all these years. seriously?

obviously these are not hard facts. the first one is. the others are all educated conjecture. but it fits. right? you know it does. i'm not sure why i even created a facebook account. it's good for playdates. but it creeps me out. it creeps out mw. it's still better to make phonecalls. it's still more personal to call our favorites and hear their voices. and so i say, facebook is dumb.